Doing Squat

I mean squat the yoga posture, not squat nothing. Today I did squat for the 94th time. Yes, I am counting. In spite of yesterday's musings about dropping expectations, squat remains my achilles heel, so to speak, and it's starting to do my head in.

In squat, you start with feet about a mat's width apart, you bend the knees into a squat, you keep your spine straight, chest open, shoulders back and down, head up, arms wide with the elbows helping press the knees apart. So far so good.

Then you put your heels on the floor. This doesn't seem to be a problem for people. They squat, balance there as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and then they stand up.

If you're me, the second you move your heels down, you do a slow-motion backwards somersault and get the giggles. It's less disruptive to the class if I just stay up on the balls of my feet and fake squat.

They say it might take some time till you can get your heels down. But 94 times? That can't be normal.

Here are all the possible explanations why I can't do squat:

• I haven't had children. Nope, neither have most of the class.
• I've had too many children. Nice try.
• I'm too old. Nope, older people do squat.
• I'm too small? Nope, the very small can do squat.
• After all this time I expect not to do squat? Maybe that's it.

Perhaps I'm just no good at doing squat. That would be correct. Always making a soup, digging a plot, planting a seed, washing or wiping something.

Here's an experiment. I will allow myself more time to do nothing, and see if that helps me do squat. I have a feeling it just might.